Being a less emotionless being

Don't waste your tears on me, for if there's one thing I don't understand, it's that outpouring of emotion. I am hardened, logical, and consistent. While tragedies and joys send your heart soaring to new heights and depths, I maintain my poise and composure in neutrality. While you shed sheer cries and howls of pain, I merely shrug off troubles and worries. While screams of excitement and elation are emitted for purposes unknown to me, I merely crack the slightest hint of a smile at my fortunes.

When life is lost, or tragedy strikes, you band together in your sorrow. When you are low, you seek comfort and support. Unified by your pain, these supporters do not repair what is lost, but they fill this void, this emptiness, caused by your strife. It is not so for me, as loss is simply a completion of the cycle.

Not only is there emotion in your misfortunes, but you trivial beings find emotion in your gains. When new life is granted, or great successes befall you, I see more damaged plumbing desperately needing tissues to stop the leaks. As with your pain, your joys bring you together. You share them and are received with excitement and congratulations only further elevating your jubilation. For some reason, it is as though any form of emotion whatsoever has potential to create a unifying experience.

It is said that men should be tough, should endure pain and not demonstrate these displays of emotion. And yet, in all this we wonder why women are so much closer to one another than men. It's as though there is some complex equation behind the circumstances that allow them to be close, but keep us at distance with one another. For some reason, we all are ashamed and embarrassed by our emotions. We hide our tears; saving them for times of privacy. It is in these times that we require one another most of all. In the past years I've felt more emotion than I know what to do with. When great joys or sorrows befall me, I've allowed them to show. I no longer calculate or question emotions with a hardened, cynical heart. I have felt joys, excitement, and love with such intensity it has brought tears to my eyes. I no longer wipe them away with frustration or embarrassment but instead enjoy the experience of being moved and stirred to such emotional heights.

I have existed in such emotionless states, afraid to express my true feelings. I felt self conscious, isolated, and tormented by my own contradictory existence. I wanted so much to have support, to have someone with whom I could share my emotions and yet I was so adamantly isolating myself that it would never have been possible. Emotion is nothing to be embarrassed about, it is nothing to hide, it should be expressed and dealt with head on. Don't hide your pain, seek comfort and support in your companions. Use emotion as it should be used; for unity rather than isolation.

When society is telling you to live by their standards and rules, think for a moment to the last time society helped you deal with anything in a positive way. Never be ashamed of your humanity.