Growing up

It's funny, I think as long as I'm alive I'll always feel the phrase "when I grow up..." will be applicable in my life. It's certainly the case right now, as it has been since I was young. When I grow up, I'd like to be a teacher, among other things of course. But I think I'll always say it. I wonder if growing up should be viewed as a thing that comes naturally with age rather than a state of mind. I know many adults who aren't grown up. I guess I'd count myself as one of them, though, so don't take my word for too much.

My life has become as "grown-up" as it's ever been, with bills, school, responsibilities, etc. I just don't feel it though. I know within the next few years, I'll be a tied down fellow who has roots starting to dig in. Even then, I wonder what growing up I'll envision having to complete, cause I know I won't give up there. Forever young, if only in mind, that's my goal.

It's not that I don't want to grow, I just don't want to outgrow the vibrancy and excitement life can bring me. I don't mean simply the huge, adult successes like getting paid, but the little things. I like to sing, I like to be awkward, I like to laugh, if all three can be combined, I like that too. I don't want to be an old man whose droopy facial features match the interior of my heart. I want to be able to take out my teeth and pretend they belong to dinosaurs, or something ridiculous like that. I want to use my cane as a sword as I swashbuckle my way around the city. I want to giggle at silly words, and allow joy to flow through me, especially if it is uncharacteristic of my age. I'll never be fully grown up, but that just gives me new things to look forward too, along with old traits that I'll never have to let go of.